Keys to Quitting Porn

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Severe addiction causes destruction. So your first goal is to be constantly aware of this damage happening again.
What pain has porn or out of control sex cost you? __________________________________________________________________________________________
One key to breaking habits is to start new relationships with people who will encourage you to start a new lifestyle.

The 2nd key is to learn new activities. What new activities will you start this week to replace porn or out-of-control sex?
1. _________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________
3. _________________________________________________________
4. _________________________________________________________

Strive to learn from people who have decided to quit. We will follow several people to see what they are doing – Bill, Lisa, Jim, Jan and Mike.

Today Bill threw away 5 porn magazines and 7 Videotapes. Today, delete porn sites from your favorites, remove any porn saved on your computer and get rid of anything that is leading you back into illicit porn or out-of-control sex.
Lisa said to herself twice today: out of control sex has caused me destruction, it has in the past and
it will in the future (unless I quit).

Jim wrote down what he planned to do today (instead of porn). If you use porn or sex for fun you
need fun activities to replace porn or sex . If you use porn or sex for excitement you need exciting activities etc.

Mike’s sex addiction has taken him all the way to rock bottom. He is 100% dedicated to change. He printed out the following article:
John Lee wrote the following at www.choosehelp.com

The Four Ds – a Simple Relapse Prevention Strategy

You can (and should) try to avoid cues and triggers but there’s no way to dodge them all; if you’re in recovery – and you want to stay in recovery – you need to learn to cope with cravings.
Cravings come in waves. They feel like they’ll last forever but if you can endure for 20 minutes or so, they always dissipate into nothingness.
And fortunately, the more often you resist those cravings, the weaker they get and the less frequently they bother you.
If you can hold on for just a few minutes, you can almost always overcome your cravings. To help you with this, here’s an easy-to-remember coping strategy (The Four Ds) to get you safely past the 20-minute danger zone where you think about porn or out-of-control sex.

The Four Ds For Porn and Sex Addiction Relapse Prevention

The Ds stand for:
1. Delay – Since cravings rise and fall like waves, if you can delay a relapse decision for 20 minutes you’ll generally find the cravings dissipate on their own.
2. Distract – Craving time passes more quickly when engaged in a distracting activity for a few minutes.
3. Deep breathing – Deep breathing exercises help you maintain calm and purpose when cravings hit, keeping you from making rash decisions.
4. Drink a glass of water – Drinking a glass of water relaxes you and sets your purpose. Imagine your cravings as like a runaway train gathering momentum to a disaster. Simple activities like taking a moment to drink a glass of water are like brakes that slow that train!

So the next time you feel a craving, remember The Four Ds and avoid a permanent mistake caused by a temporary urge.
Here are some solid distraction ideas that will keep you occupied just long enough. Try any or all that make sense to you, or better yet, come up with a list of your own.
You may want to write down a few go-to distraction tasks and keep them on your person (see the example chart at the end of this article). This way you won’t be left scrambling for distraction ideas when already struggling with cravings – you’ll have your ideas planned out and ready to go.

Distraction Ideas for Cravings

1. Take a shower, even if you don’t need one. Scrub hard and turn the water as hot (or cold) as you can stand it. Let it soak into you for a few minutes and by the time you towel dry 20 minutes later you’ll probably feel a lot less tempted to fold.
2. Wash and wax the car
3. Call a friend and talk about their problems (not yours)
4. Clean the fridge, the bathroom or the garage – cleaning anything provides just the right amount of physical exertion and mental distraction – and as an added bonus you feel better after getting it done.2
5. Walk the dog (or just take a walk around the block)
6. Go jogging
7. Do a quick home work-out
8. Meditate or do yoga
9. Play a musical instrument
10. Do a progressive muscle relaxation exercise or write in a journal
11. Catch up on work for a few minutes
12. Prepare an interesting snack, and then enjoy it
13. Do a crossword or Sudoku puzzle
14. If you’re tempted to drink or use at home, then get out of the house and go for a drive. This can be risky. Don’t get in the car if you’ll steer by autopilot to the nearest bar or drug dealer
15. Play a challenging video game
16. Do bicycle maintenance

The next time you feel a craving coming on, take a moment to feel it in your body, and then tell yourself that it’s going to pass if you can just wait it out – and then use one of the methods listed above (or any others you can think of) to distract yourself while you wait for that urge to disappear.

Write down 5 distraction idea’s that might help you to stop 

1

2

3

4

Reasons for Change

To be a better parent for my child. Kids: To avoid breaking a promise to my child that I would not mess up again

To get out of the black hole I am in

Because you are no longer excited with physical intimacy

To stay married (spouse will divorce me if I keep screwing up)

Your habit is messing up your work

Negative Expectations For Porn and Sex Addiction

If I fall now I will wake up at 4 in the morning feeling ashamed.
Looking at porn now will cause me to keep looking even more often tomorrow.
If I live in lust now I will probably keep struggling with it for months or years.”

Do not be mad at God or at people who can help you. Allow somebody to have a platonic love for you and be open to their help.
Thomas Vilord said “If you have goals and procrastination you have nothing. If you have goals and take action you can have anything that you want”
I will give you new things to think about and focus on. I will help you develop a dynamic organized system which
will give you the weapons you need to fight your addiction.

Never forget the #1 rule to get rid of this addiction: Never give up.

“If you are aware of your weaknesses and are constantly learning – your potential is virtually limitless.”
Overcoming Addiction Quote by Jay Sidhu

Ways to avoid giving in to the urges: get a notebook to add idea’s about quitting addiction from this day and every day.

Thank you for reading day 1: Relapse prevention strategy for porn and sex addiction.

Please click on day 2 in the lower right-hand corner.