Stop The Addictions | Sex/Porn freedom in 30 days: day 25
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Sex/Porn freedom in 30 days: day 25

Jesus said “If your hand offends you, cut it off“ (Matt 5:30).  What He is saying is to cut off the source of your addiction or sin. The source is not the event, it is what leads to the event. Examples of sources are: daydreaming about smut, continuing to watch a movie which features nudity or sex, looking for too long, moping around saying that you can’t do the one thing you love the most.

Hello – you are aware of the destruction, now put in the work to think about new things. Put forth effort to do new things. Be more aware of when you start to skate down a slippery path and be proud of yourself when you turn it around. No one at a support group will cheer if you get up and say: “I started to watch a movie which turned out to be all about sex and I turned it off.” But your life if going to be a great story a year from now because that is how you take the steel grip of addiction to the fire and start to melt it. When you stop looking at smut, daydreaming about sex, and talking about sex: you will start to think about new things. You will start to do new things. And for a while you won’t be thrilled with the change. Then at some point you will be so excited about the change that you will tell everyone you know – I never ever want to go back to living the way I used to.

Memorize this fact: All addictions will substantially lower our quality of life. When we start to worship God instead of worshipping our own pleasure we will be happier.

Find Real Love

Some of us shut everybody out because they have caused us pain in the past. Now, try to reverse that behavior by praying to be filled with Jesus love. God loves to answer a pray like “Father, take away my lust, selfishness, pride _____ (you fill in the blank) and fill me with your love”. We have been at least part of the problem in the past. Now (with prayer) we can become at least part of the solution.  Developing and healing of relationships is very helpful in breaking bad habits.

Quitting an addiction is a lot like becoming a track star. To become a track star you must deny yourself certain things (fatty foods, extra rest etc). But just as important you must work at doing things (running, lifting weights and eating extra protein).

People who become track stars live their life like they are surrounded by a hard plastic bubble. They refuse to give any opening to excess foods like sugars, fats etc. They give no opening to the party lifestyle. They hang around with people dedicated to training not people who have a wild lifestyle. They read about and watch people who are successful in athletics. They think about how to train better, how to run more effectively, how to strategize a smarter race. They have a 100% focus on what they want to accomplish.

People who want to become track stars (but fail) do not take care of their bubble. They may train hard but their sexual lust opens a hole in their bubble. Or their pride opens a hole in their bubble and they don’t listen to their coach. Or they think more about other things and lose their focus on training. This opens up a big hole because they start to not even care about winning any more.

Other people pop their bubble right from the start because they don’t train consistently. They will run but not lift weights. Run and lift but consistently overeat. Work hard but do the opposite of what their coach wants because they insist on doing it their way.

When we repent of our addiction before Jesus Christ we are sealed in the bubble by His blood. But we carve openings in our protection through sins, habits, grey area’s, bad friends, looking at the wrong things, thinking about the wrong things etc. I can’t list the million ways you carve a hole in your protection. But it is vital that you list and understand the main things you do which ruin your protective shield.

It is just as vital that you list and understand the things that you are not doing which cause the bubble to burst. Maybe you are willing to read the Bible but you are going to think your way not God’s way. You are willing to pray but only pray that God will solve your problems not change you. You are willing to help others, but you are going to keep Christianity on the down low. You are not sure they will be all that accepting of that. You are going to work at quitting that addiction but you only put aside a few minutes a day to work on that. You have more important things to do.

Remember, when your bubble has openings in it – dark forces will slip in and cause confusion and temptation. The solution is rapid repentance and taking care that your shield is solid without any openings for the enemy to come in through. The permanent solution is to treat your quest to overcome addiction just as seriously as the track star takes winning. They allow nothing to come into their lives that will derail their training. They always do everything they need to do to prepare for the race.

Take 5 minutes to analyze what causes openings in your protection.

Emotions often lead back to sex or porn. Anger often leads straight back into addiction for many people. One reason for this is because anger is often followed by depression. Depression for some people leads straight to sex or porn. So it is important to develop a better understanding of anger. www.angermentor.com says “When angry consider yourself drunk. Make no decisions and take no action while angry. No exceptions! You will either regret it or it will have negative consequence for your life – 100% of the time. It never fails. Your mind is really that clouded. Your judgement is that impaired”.

Have a list of alternate activities and refer to that list when emotions upset you.

Joyce Meyer in her article Dealing with Anger…God’s Way, said:

“Get to the Root of the Problem. Anger is caused by injustice, strife, impatience, jealousy, unmet needs, abuse and many other things.

Anger is the fruit of rotten roots. One of the primary roots of anger stems from the family. Angry people come from angry families because they learn from their role models and carry on the same behavior in their own lives, eventually passing it on to their children.

Other Roots of Anger Include… Abuse of any kind—sexual, physical, verbal, emotional or mental abuse almost always leads to anger. They’re all injustices, which eventually leave the abused feeling helpless and angry. Abuse of any kind can’t be ignored. We must deal with it and process it before we can get free of it.

Unmet needs—can also produce anger. We all have needs that can and should be met by those closest to us; however, they don’t know and understand our needs unless we communicate with them. But even then they may sometimes fail to meet our needs. Therefore, the answer is to go to God with our needs and not to other people.

Face the Truth… And Choose Your Pain If you want the great and mighty things God has for you, you must get to the root of anger and deal with it. Get rid of the masks and face the things that happened in your life that made you the way you are today. Admit that you can’t change by yourself. Until the root is removed, it’ll continue to produce one bad fruit after another. Too often we spend our lives dealing with the bad fruit of our behavior, but we never dig deep enough to get to the root of the problem. Actually, when we’re faced with anger, we must choose our pain.

Digging deep to take care of the bad root is painful, but it’s the only lasting way to take care of the problem. We can either suffer positively, doing what’s right or we can go with the devil’s

plan. You must decide if you want the pain that will take you into a new realm of glory or to keep your same old pain and try to hide it while it’s rotting inside you.

Peter tells us to be well-balanced and temperate, withstanding the devil at his onset (see

1 Peter 5:8-9). When you begin to feel anger, it’s the perfect time to exercise the fruit of self-control. You may have a good reason to be angry, but don’t use it as an excuse to stay that way. Instead of denying or justifying it, ask God to help you deal with it in a positive way.

Is all anger sin? No, but some of it is. Even God Himself has righteous anger against sin, injustice, rebellion and pettiness. Anger sometimes serves a useful purpose, so it isn’t necessarily always a sin.

Ephesians 4:26-27 tells us, When angry, do not sin; do not ever let your wrath (your exasperation, your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down. Leave no [such] room or foothold for the devil [give no opportunity to him]. Refuse to give the devil any opportunity to get a foothold in your life through anger.

All anger, regardless of its cause, has the same effect on our lives. It upsets us, causing us to feel pressure. Keeping anger locked inside and pretending it doesn’t exist can even be dangerous to our health. Most of the time we’re only hurting ourselves, and the person who angered us isn’t even aware of it. So we must take responsibility for our anger and learn to deal with it. Process it and bring closure to it, and that will relieve the pressure. I have been through some rough times in my life, and for many years those experiences caused me to feel miserable. I was so mad about the abuse in my childhood that it was making me bitter and hateful. I was angry with everybody, but one day God confronted me and said, “Joyce, are you going to let that make you bitter or better?” That got my attention, and I eventually had to find a positive way to process my anger. That was a place of new beginnings for me. When you face your anger and decide to deal with it God’s way, you can overcome it. The Holy Spirit gives us the power to be stable and walk in the fruit of the Spirit. We have the power to forgive those who do injustices in our lives and to love the unlovely.

When Satan makes you angry, remember that he’s trying to keep you from accomplishing the will of God in your life.

Overcome evil and anger by praying for those who hurt and abuse you. Forgive them and be a blessing to them. It may not be easy at first, but when you make the decision and stick with it, God will take care of the rest”.

Will Rogers said, “Whenever you fly into a rage, you seldom make a safe landing.” And he is right.

Proverbs 19:19 says, “A hot-tempered man must pay the penalty.” We’re being told that almost every day. Doctors tell us that losing our temper consistently brings about high blood pressure, dryness of mouth, & a fast-beating heart. It could even bring pre-mature death.

A hot temper could also mean loss of family & friends. The penalties of anger are many.

So we need to recognize that we have a problem with anger. As long as we deny it, as long as we blame it on heritage or short-fuse or whatever we choose to blame it on, we’ll never improve.

Then we must confess our problem to God & ask for His help. “Lord, I’m beginning to lose my temper, & I’ve done it many times before. Please help me see what is causing it to happen, & then help me to overcome it.”
The Bible teaches that when the Holy Spirit guides our life, that one fruit of the spirit is self control. And if you have anger, you need to control it.

When we lack self control and lose our temper the first result is “bitterness.” You begin to think about all the bad things people do & say to you, all the insults, all of the inconsiderate things that go on.

Then Paul says, “After bitterness comes rage & anger.” “Rage” is bitterness boiling & bubbling inside of you. And “anger” is rage being expressed. It is no longer just inside you. Now you begin to kick the cat, & hit the wall. Now you begin to say all kinds of things, until finally it becomes “brawling,” which means “shouting loudly,” & “slander” or “insults.”

And the end result of it all, Paul says, is “malice.” And “malice” means that you really desire to harm. That’s why we’re always reading about someone shooting his wife & turning the gun on himself. Because the ultimate end of stubborn anger is malice.

Paul said, “Here is the way to get rid of stubborn anger. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath.” Vs. 32 says, “Be kind & compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

The Bible says …we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places (Ephesians 6:12 KJV). There is Holy anger and there is sinful anger. If you have fiddled around with sin, anger is often something that attaches itself to you. Sure someone may cause it to erupt, but it is in you and you need to get it out of you.

Key Point #1 Pray every morning and evening: Jesus please take this anger out of me. If you have a serious problem pray it ten times or thirty times a day. Life is way better without anger and the baggage anger brings with it.

Galatians 5 New International Version (NIV)

19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

1 Corinthians 6:9 King James Version (KJV) Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God?

Why does 1st Corinthians 6 and Galatians 5 say the harsh things they say? It may be because when we accept Christ we join God’s army. There is a massive war going on. God has huge things for every person to do. At first He may only give us small things to do until we straighten up enough to do the huge things. But we need to train always to do the huge things while we do the small things.

If we commit the sins which waste our time and money the disobedience is a problem. But the real problem is God’s army went off to war and ____ stayed behind because of _____ .  What should God do with the deserters? In 2017 in America virtually no one is taught about the urgency and importance of serving in God’s army. No one is taught to have a passion for winning the war. A passion for souls. A love for the people all around us dying and going to hell.

 

I focus on this passage regularly because I want to be fully aware of the war which is going on. I must quit any addictions so that I am able to do the task that God has for me to do. Quitting ________ shows the world you are fully aware of the war going on. It tells everybody that you will be as strong as you can be so that you can accomplish God’s plan for you.

Read John 20 2nd Corinthians 6 and Proverbs 18

Continue to read the Purpose Driven Life.

If you are struggling complete the exercises from day 2

If you would like to start living in God’s blessing pray: “Father – I plan to start doing things your way, obeying your commands, studying the Word. Please bless me when you are ready to do so. I am planning to do my part and I will patiently wait for you to bless me when the time is right.” 

Index

Day 1: Overcoming cravings

Day2 : Is God real?

Day 3: Quitting addiction exercises

Day 4: Getting negative emotions out

Day 5: You can never increase the amount of pleasure that you can have for the month by going back to an addiction

Day 6: Sin leads back to addiction

Day 7: Worshiping God helps us overcome addiction

Day 8: What causes you to stay addicted

Day 9: Develop positive addicitons

Day 10: Overcoming negative emotions

Day 11: You have some self control

Day 12: Always have a list of alternate activities to do when temptation hits

Day 13: Only living water can satisfy you for good

Day 14: Learning form the story of Adam and Eve

Day 15: Blessings and curses

Day 16: Self Control

Day 17: Self Control continued

Day 18: Learning to pray

Day 19: What kind of prayers does God answer

Day 21: Finding a Church that can help you

Day 22: Why is it so hard to quit

Day 23: plan plan plan

Day 24: Don’t condemn yourself